Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

Dear mom,

I missed you on Mother's Day. I kept having the urge to pick up the phone to dial your number, but I kept having to remind myself that you weren't there to answer. I know that we had plans to go pick out some flowers last year, but we never had the chance. John took me to Al's and we picked out some Gerber daisies for you. I made you a really neat flower pot before Christmas so I will have to plant them in there for you! John and Hudson sure spoiled me too. I got to go out to brunch with "my boys" and John's parents, and it was so nice! I also got to take a shopping trip all by myself and then just relax. Hudson and John also made me a "World's Greatest Mom" trophy from scratch in the shop. I loved it. Mother's Day has a whole new meaning to me now. I always loved spoiling you every May, but now I realize how much you needed it. You did so much for Amy and I growing up. I know that sometimes you doubted yourself, but you were such an amazing mother. I have learned so much from you, and especially over the past few months have I realized just how many of your great qualities I have inherited. You taught me to work hard and be proud of what I have accomplished, no matter how much I enjoyed doing it. You taught me to stand up for myself and to not settle for being treated poorly. You taught me honesty, integrity, and responsibility. You also taught me that my most valuable asset was my reputation, so to always take care of it and make sure I was trustworthy and dependable. I am surprised by how strong I have become since saying goodbye to you. I feel like somehow, during your passing, I inherited part of your role in the family. I just want you to know that I will always make sure that you are present in everything we do. I made sure to carry out Amy's surprise birthday party last weekend just like you were planning on doing, and I will also make sure that her wedding goes perfectly as well. She has tried to give me a hard time about it, but with the persistence that I know you would have had with her, I finally broke her down! I'm really struggling mom to make sure that Hudson's first birthday is as special as I know you would have made it for him. I know how excited you were to throw him a party, so I will do my best to make sure you are represented. I chose a Sesame Street theme because I have very vague memories of a Big Bird cake at my first birthday! Anyway mom, I just wanted to tell you that I have been thinking about you lately and wishing you were here. I'm very glad that you were with me through the difficult few months of being a new mom, and I learned so much patience, resilience, and confidence from you. I will always carry those valuable lessons with me and try to apply them in everything I do. I am so proud that you are my mom.

Happy Mother's Day,

Sarah