At about 3 months old, Hudson started sleeping through the night. 12 hours of total, uninterrupted sleep!! I knew how lucky I was and it was awful fun to "brag" about! Of course, as with all babies, that did not last long and now I am eating crow. For a good solid 4-6 weeks after that he was waking all through the night and I was so at the end of my rope! Luckily, thanks to his two teeth finally coming in, and the discovery of infant Tylenol, we are now to only one wake up per night, which usually falls between 1 and 3am. Now most moms would not consider a 6.5 month old still waking up to eat "lucky", but I really enjoy that quiet time each morning with my baby boy, and the time it gives me to reflect without distraction on things my mind wonders to.
This was my 3am thought yesterday morning...
Nothing is permanent anymore. If you don't like a tattoo, you can get it lasered off. If you loose a limb, you can get a prosthesis. Don't like who you married? Get a divorce. I have grown up in the culture of instant gratification and being able to solve any problem I have with a few keystrokes. Maybe that is why I am having such a hard time wrapping my brain around this "death" idea. I keep wanting to say, "Okay God, I learned my lesson, bring her back now!" But unfortunately, I think I found the one thing in this world that is still permanent. And it baffles me even further that something so huge, so life-changing, and so "timeline altering" could happen so quickly and unexpectedly. It is weird how many "near misses" we have in life. John doesn't like the term, near miss though, because you DID miss, it should actually be near hit. Think about all of the near hits you have had, and then try to wrap your mind around the fact that you may not even be aware of how many near hits you have had!! I can guarantee that my mom was not looking forward to having to wake up at 3am that morning to go to work a special assignment. But I bet that she would have much rather woken up. On the other hand though, if she had woken up for work that morning, she would have never even considered what the other possibility could have been, which was not waking up. Would she have appreciated that day on earth? Probably not, it was a day at work and she was tired! This whole scenario reminds me of It's a Wonderful Life and A Christmas Carol. When the characters get to see what life would be like without them, or what things could be different. If you were given the opportunity to wake up at 3am, or not wake up at all, what would you choose?
Thank you God for those 3 am feedings. For allowing me to wake up to another day with my son and my husband. Thank you for allowing me to make it to work safely, and for a nice warm house to come home to. And thank you for allowing all of my friends and family the opportunity to wake up way too early as well.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment